Saturday, April 29, 2006

HOs HO’s HO’s , Slum Village said it best and they must have been thinking about this woman here . Storm……


About five months a go I started this journey into exposing the realest whore in the marvel universe. She’s the Buffie the body of Marvel. People want her and people get her. I mean the girls had more rubber on here than the 405 freeway (that’s for my Los Angeles folks). So when I last left off I was telling you about how she runs through the marvel universe fucking and sucking up a storm… Get it? Ok ok I know cheap shot but it was funny. Well let’s go down the list she’s had Doom Some jungle man an African King and even had Dracula sucking her off RIP AL Lewis.


So now here we are time to continue this journey of a ho turned housewife turned goddess turned Halle Berry .




So After that short run in with the Count she was off to fuck up another man's head but this time on her way she lost her groove and almost drowned in the bayou, but was then saved by this one armed one leg cat named Forge. She gave up the goods of course seeing that she had never had amputee sex, But she was quick to leave him cause she wasn't down with that Indian Casino shit ya know. We all know she left cause son put that Native American charm on her and opened her shit up, but alas.... So she flew to Africa to get back to her roots and ended up meeting this God named Loki. This cat played captain save a hoe and gave her diamonds and shit and all she did in return is use them fucking horns as a dildo.

That shit got old and she went back to the X Mansion and tried to get some of that Summers dick But he wasn't having it he was too busy thinking about Heath Ledger or some gay shit so she tried to bounce on the whole X -Team.
But then who does she run into? That's right her ex lover Callisto. Now I don't know about lesbian relationships but I hear those things are violent so I'm not even gonna touch the subject. Anyway, she makes it back to the mansion and runs into a new and Improved John Redcor...... I mean Forge who does this crazy ass war dance to call his wind pussy back.
Well it worked he had this broad on sprung she stayed with him at his spot and they "fell in Love". Well later on the X-Men fight this adversary cat and win but then pretened to be dead. All the while Storm starts a secret relationship with Jean Grey, Which not only angers the "I'm not gay but I look like it" Cyclops. He approached her and asked why didn't she say anything "I would have jumped in." But you know Storms a greedy hoe she don't share her goodies with no one. Well it went from bad to worse cause John Redforge wasn't going for that lesbo ish and when he found out he walked. He has been the only piece of dick to ever get out of her sticky grasp....

Well I was trying to make this a two part series but man this girl has had so many a lover that Wilt Champerlain was on her list..... So wait another 5 months to see the rest of STORM NUMBER ONE SUPER HOE.

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Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Oh Stan... Stan, My Man.



Why do you hurt me?

Why do you hurt us all?




BTW This not my "official" first blog entry... Soon come.

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The following is a guest entry by an associate of mine, Wilbur Simons.

Hello Internet. My name is Wilbur Simons. I was invited to this blog by Mr. Kangaroo Love after he overheard me at the comics shop arguing about whether or not Poison Ivy could seduce Midnighter from The Authority. I am writing this because I have something to get off my chest. I have been collecting comic books since 1975 so I feel my opinion is very valuable. But right now I am not happy. I have a bone to pick with DC for their unethical treatment of Firestorm, the greatest hero to ever grace the DCU.



Ronnie Raymond is my favorite character of all time, so it absolutely traumatized me when DC hired hack writer Brad Meltzer to kill him off in Identity Crisis so he could be replaced with a new edgy & hip wannabe incarnation.

I think this is a detriment to Firestorm fans as well as a disgrace to the character. First to make something clear, I know many people will assume I don't like the new Firestorm because he is African-American. That is not true. I place Blade in my top 5 vampire hunters of all time and I am the proud owner of a framed photo of myself with Billy Dee Williams. So you can clearly see I am not a racist. I would'nt even like this new Firestorm if he was a white guy named Wilbur who liked tapioca pudding and SG1.

What I am here to do is make a difference. That is why I am organizing a group known as R.N.A.S.F. (Ronnie's Nuclear Army of Special Friends.) We will make our presence known and continue to boycott all DC Comics products until Ronnie Raymond is reinstated as his rightful position of Firestorm. If you call yourself a true Firestorm fan, I urge you to join me.

Thank you, Internet.

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Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Where Art Thou, Superman?

(contains Infinite Crisis spoilers)

Calling all cars, calling all cars.

Looking for a white Caucasian male, possible alien.

About 6 feet tall, dark hair, blue eyes...Able to leap tall buildings in a singe bound.

Goes by the name of Kal-El or Superman.

I thought Infinite Crisis was supposed to reinvigorate the Big 3.

If that's the case, where's Waldo...I mean...Superman been this entire series?


Nope, everything seems fine around here.
I guess I'm not needed


Wonder Woman spent two issues defending Themyscira from OMACs and hanging out with Earth-2 Wonder Woman.

Batman? He's been everywhere.

In the course of this series, Batman has...
...been at the ruins of the Watchtower
...back in Gotham where he met Earth 2 Supes and faced off against Red Hood in his own book
...Bludhaven to meet up with Nightwing
...back in Gotham with the Brave and The Bold planning an attack on Brother Eye
...in space knocking Brother Eye out of orbit
...finally ending up at Alexander Luthor's tower which is apparently right by The Fortress of Solitude

All this despite not having the gift of flight.

Superman? well, after getting emasculated by Batman, he actually went back to WORK as Clark Kent for a spell. He stopped some windows from falling on a crowd, stopped a couple of OMACs, hooked up with Earth-2 Superman on Earth 2 and finally showed up to his neighborhood to watch Superboy die. Did Ruin keep him THAT occupied?

I know Superman can't be everywhere at once but if Batman can get around...



No, it may seem like I'm being a little unforgiving here but the only way Infinite Crisis works if Superman happens to not be around.

You're saying with all that was going on...Earth 2 Superman flying around on his Earth, the Society killing the Freedom Fighters, Superboy Prime going to HIS house in Kansas and fighting our Superboy all the way to Keystone City, the sonic booms created by the Flashes, the only time he did something is when he heard Earth 2 Superman yell "Lois" (from another Earth no less which he got to pretty quickly)?

As George Oscar Bluth II (a.k.a. G.O.B.) on Arrested Development would say, "Come on!"

I'm sure Superman will do something MIND BLOWINGLY AMAZING in Infinite Crisis #7 but it will be a case of too little too late.



Batman's right, maybe Superman should just die to inspire everyone again...

Oh wait, I think I just figured out Infinite Crisis #7...

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