Thursday, February 16, 2006


X-Force : Hate, Murder, and Longshot's Demonseed

Hello Boys and Girl. I came across some old X-force issues and asked myself "am i the only one that enjoyed these books?"

The answer is usually YES. In capitals just like that. Maybe it was because I had a soft spot for Shatterstar" the boringest superhero ever"? Probably so.

Every writer that touched him(not the way Rictor touched him) tried to give him their own spin on his origin. Is he a clone from longshot's man juice? Is he Benjamin Russell? Is he a giant tool being used in a horrible way!? yes! I think im the only person outside of a looney bin that thinks Shatterstar would've worked if they stayed far away from Longshot's mullet and totally denying Shatty a personality. If i had wrote for Shatty Shats first Ii'd give him a better power. Besides the whole agile bit, i'd play off that Bio-Energy schtick to the point where he can punch you in the head at a speed that would resonate sound waves inside of your skull causing it to explode. Sorta like the fist of the north star. He wouldn't be manwich man either. Even if he was he wouldn't have brokebacked it with Rictor, i mean really, no one liked Rictor. Shats wouldn't be longshot's clone/son. He'd be Longshot's older brother, the Noogey giving Wayne to his narrating pansy Arnold.


Another reason i thought X-force was cool is because no one liked each other. Everyone dissed Feral and she had no problem gutting fools up. Her character was actually really interesting once they revealed she was a cold blooded murderer. BTW thats sammy gunthrie getting slit down there.

Warpath was native-american so he hated everyone except Sunspot and Feral. Boom Boom was a cunt who was drawn like a 30 year old yet written for like a 15 year old. Cable was a hard ass. Siryn was a raging alcy. Everyone else fell into the "you're not important" cubby hole. Cannonball, Domino, Rictor, and whoever else they added on afterwards.

Maybe if Nicienza wasn't Marvel's man-whore in the early to mid-90's and had time to focus on one book(x-force!) it would've worked out and not have become the slutty-time-traveling-no-one-cares-what-happens-next obscure "X-Book".....

i'll leave you with this disturbing image of Rictor staring at Shatty from behind a fence while shirtless.

9 comments:

Da Black Goku said...

BWAHAHA... suffice it to say you are not the only one to enjoy the CABLE-years of New Mutants turned X-Force. I especially liked the fact that this is when the X-books turned ultra violent. At least for a bit.

It's a shame most of the characters are either depowered or in the id of obscurity. It's actually kind of cool that Warpath is about to make a comeback as a team member in Uncanny and Rictor is making a few rounds in the new X-Force title.

As for Shatterstar? He was a victim of the 90's glam scene and has been written into idiodacy ever since.

I miss the good ol' days.

Da Black Goku said...

Oh yeah, wasn't Feral and her sister depowered too? Yeah, I think that was established in the Generation M issues, but I'm waiting for the TPB.

PlatonJK said...

yea the butter pecan rican twins are depowered

toothpick said...

boom boom has got the glammest post x-force role in that new warren ellis next wave book.

and warpath is back, i don't know why. brubaker's roster makes me yaawwwwn.

PlatonJK said...

is nextwave a parody type comic that doesn't play into any real continuity?

alsoi think brubaker can make something of that roster. warpath isn't a bad character. its just no one has used him right besides being the big strong guy. other than that marvel girl, nightcrawler, "new" polaris, havoc, and his brother might work. brubakers run is basically going to be about marvel girl vs. the shi'ar so everyone else is just extra

KangolLove said...

Domino was kinda sexy in a Spot the Dog kinda way.

PlatonJK said...

Domino just didn't listen....lol

melvin p. mouse said...

hah! I've got a few of these old X-Force comics.... but If Prep time Posse was a maxiseries, I'd buy all 12 issues.

phenompyrus said...

Yknow the book I loved was X-Factor, back when the team was Havok, Polaris, Wolfsbane, Strong Guy, and Multiple Man. That book was live as hell.